Pat Treuer had the 'perfect' life - a six-figure corporate job, a downtown apartment, a life with world travels many only dream of. So why did he feel empty inside? What would you risk to find true fulfillment?

In Will I Hate Myself, Pat buries that life, picks up a microphone, and stares down his ultimate fear: being himself and starting over from scratch at age 36, and then again at 42.

Join Pat on a rollercoaster ride from boardrooms to comedy backrooms. One day he's selling his soul; the next he's bombing on stage at a dive bar open-mic, heart pounding as he chases a laugh to save his life. 

This is the true story of a man who traded stability for a spotlight, and the absurd, poignant, and triumphant moments that follow. From awkward first gigs in Chicago, to launching a charity comedy show that brought laughter & food to thousands​, to starting a million dollar comedy business, only to put all the money into a free YouTube Comedy Series that didn't make one cent, Pat's journey will make you laugh, cry and cheer.

Along the way, Pat confronts the question that haunted him: "Will I hate myself for doing this?" His candid confessions - including secrets he's never shared in his act - reveal the ugly anxieties behind it all. Will he find self-acceptance, or fall flat on his face?